Best jokes

  You Might Be A Redneck If
Your car burns more oil than gas.
Your mother is hairier than your father.
You can't get married to your sweetheart because there is a law against it.
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Joke mark: 9 (from 1 marks) - Give a mark for joke

  A Letter From A Redneck Mother To Her Son
Dear Son,

I'm writing this slow 'cause I know you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you left. Your dad read in the paper that most accidents happen within twenty miles of home, so we moved. Won't be able to send you the address as the last Arkansas family that lived here took the numbers with them for their house, so they wouldn't have to change their address.

This place has a washing machine. The first day I put four shirts in it, pulled the chain and haven't seen 'em since.

It only rained twice this week, three days the first time and four days the second time.

The coat you wanted me to send to you, Aunt Sue said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with them heavy buttons, so we cut them off and put them in the pockets.

We got a bill from the funeral home, and it said if we didn't make the final payment on Grandma's funeral bill, up she comes.

About your sister, she had a baby this morning. I haven't found out whether if it is a boy or a girl so don't know if you are an Aunt or Uncle.

Your Uncle John fell in the whiskey vat. Some men tried to get him out, but he fought them off playfully, so he drowned. We cremated him and he burned for three days.

Three of your friends went off the bridge in a pickup. One was driving and the other two were in the back. The driver got out. He rolled down the window and swam to safety. The other 2 drowned. They couldn't get the tail gate down.

Not much more news this time. Nothing much happened. If you don't get this letter, please let me know and I will send another one.

Love, Ma
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Joke mark: 8.57 (from 7 marks) - Give a mark for joke

  You might be a Redneck if

You've got more than one brother named "Darryl".
When you take a load to the dump and bring back more than you took.
You think fast food is hitting a possum at 65 mph.
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Joke mark: 7.33 (from 3 marks) - Give a mark for joke

  You might be a Redneck if
You think TACO BELL is the Mexican Phone Company.
Your state's got a new law that says when a couple get divorced, they are still legally brother and sister.
You think there's nothin wrong with incest as long as you keep it in the family.
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Joke mark: 6.67 (from 3 marks) - Give a mark for joke

  You Might Be A Redneck If
You fish in your above-ground pool... and catch something.
Your mama has more tattoos than you do.
Your dad walks you to school because you are both in the same grade.
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Joke mark: 6.67 (from 3 marks) - Give a mark for joke